Weed Was Better When It Was Illegal: A Nostalgic Rant

TOTS420 — Weed Was Better When It Was Illegal A Nostalgic Rant — Cannabis Comedy Podcast with Justin Barone

Weed Was Better When It Was Illegal: A Nostalgic Rant

Justin has a confession. He misses his dealer.

Not the parking lot dime bag days. Not the sketchy meet in a dark alley stuff. The dealer you could actually visit. The one who had a personality, a living room full of lizard cages, and a black shiny Python coiled on the floor that Justin spent ten full minutes admiring as a carpet.

This week on Thoughts Off The Stem it’s a full nostalgic rant about what the dealer era was really like — the characters, the camaraderie, the completely unpredictable experiences — and what got lost when weed legalization turned the whole thing into an iPhone store.


Become a part of the community

join the sesh!


Gear Up For The Sesh.

King Palm is what’s on the table when the mic is on. The same wraps used on the show — now available for your sesh. 🌿


Thoughts Off The Stem | Cannabis Infused Comedy
Thoughts Off The Stem | Cannabis Infused Comedy
The weird world of weed dealers
Loading
/


The Python Carpet

There was a dealer named Gary. Gary lived in a basement apartment, he had lizard cages lining every wall of his living room. Gary also had a coiled black Python in the center of his living room floor that was so big and so shiny, when Justin walked in and sat down on the couch, he spent the next ten minutes genuinely admiring what he believed to be a very cool carpet.

He was even planning to ask Gary where he got it.

Then the carpet blinked. Then the carpet raised its head — above the chicken wire fence that was apparently supposed to contain it — and Justin was gone. Out of the apartment. Up the stairs. Outside on the street for 35 minutes while his buddies stayed inside smoking a joint and talking about him.

That was the weird world of weed dealers. And Justin kind of misses it.


The Dealer Who Withheld The Weed

Then there was the dealer around 25 to 30 who had a rule — you had to hang out for at least half an hour before you could leave. In the beginning this was fine. Bust a couple poppers, play video games for three hours, go home. Good times.

Then he got married. And suddenly showing up to buy a gram meant building a tree house first. Helping fix a pond. Gardening for the first hour before anything fun could happen. Helping him move when he moved. Building an entire deck.

Weed is not a gateway drug. Weed is — as Justin puts it — a socially maniacal herb. It makes you want to be friendly to everybody. It lets you get sucked in through empathy to help people out. And if your dealer has the best weed in town you will build whatever he needs built.


What Legal Cannabis Got Wrong

Walking into a dispensary now is like walking into an Apple Store. Forty employees. Forty options. Someone immediately asking what they can help you with. Justin just wants a bag of weed and there’s no good way to say that while standing under fluorescent lighting next to a glass display case.

The experience is gone. The characters are gone. The camaraderie is gone. And the Cannabis Council of Canada just disbanded — leaving the industry without a lobbying voice in government at a time when it probably needs one.

Justin’s theory — and it makes more sense the more you think about it — is that the government should have just licensed the dealers that were already dealing. Keep the garage, basement and backyard shed. Just inspect it for compliance and let the culture stay intact.

Because right now the industry is missing something. Less corporate glow. More mom and pop, or spending time with your favourite hippie. More of what made getting weed an experience rather than a transaction.


Listen Now

Weed Was Better When It Was Illegal: A Nostalgic Rant is available now on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube, and all major platforms.

New episodes of Thoughts Off The Stem drop every Friday at 4:20 PM.


Become a part of the community

join the sesh!


Gear Up For The Sesh.

King Palm is what’s on the table when the mic is on. The same wraps used on the show — now available for your sesh. 🌿


Represent The Sesh.

Five years. Over 200 episodes. Still going. Grab the gear and wear it like you mean it.

Shop The TOTS Official Store → TOTS Official Store

Front view of a black Thoughts Off The Stem (TOTS) premium hoodie featuring bold white font test that reads TOTS EST. 2020 on the centre chest.
Back view of the TOTS Broadcaster hoodie showing a detailed radio tower graphic with 'Thoughts Off The Stem' integrated into the design.

Thoughts Off The Stem A cannabis infused comedy podcast

Join the sesh at tots420.com 🌿 Contact Thoug

Popsicles, Assembly Line Revenge and the Most Interesting Cardiologist Ever

Thoughts Off The Stem episode thumbnail featuring host Justin Barone sitting at his desk with his head in his hands looking exhausted. Three illustrated comic strip thought bubbles surround him — top left shows two guys on a park bench with the caption "Dudes and Popsicles: Dude, No. Not in Public." Top center shows a workplace scene captioned "Immature Work Revenge: Breakroom Sabotage." Bottom right shows a flirtatious doctor and patient scene captioned "Very Don Juan Doctor Visit: Charm vs. Symptoms." Large text reads "3AM Thoughts — People Are Weird" against a dark green background with the Thoughts Off The Stem logo in the top left corner.

Popsicles, Assembly Line Revenge and the Most Interesting Cardiologist Ever

Three things happened. All of them need to be discussed. None of them are normal.

This week on Thoughts Off The Stem, Justin Barone covers the definitive rule on dudes eating popsicles in public, a two hour assembly line revenge plot that was absolutely worth it, and a cardiology appointment at Toronto General that briefly felt like the opening scene of a Spanish soap opera.

He was not high for any of it. He deeply regrets that.


Become a part of the community

join the sesh!


Gear Up For The Sesh.

King Palm is what’s on the table when the mic is on. The same wraps used on the show — now available for your sesh. 🌿


Thoughts Off The Stem | Cannabis Infused Comedy
Thoughts Off The Stem | Cannabis Infused Comedy
Things Guys Shouldn’t Do, Worker Revenge and a XXX Doctor Visit
Loading
/


The Popsicle Rule

It was a heat wave. The company put out a freezer full of free popsicles. Justin watched what happened next and cannot unsee it.

Here’s the rule. If you’re a dude eating a popsicle in public — you bite it. That’s it. Full stop. End of discussion. There is no alternative. You do not hawk that thing. Don’t wrap your tongue around it like a giraffe taking food from someone’s hand. Bite it, you eat it, you move on with your life and your dignity intact.

Justin is not saying this to be immature. Justin is saying this because he had to watch an entire assembly line of men completely ignore this rule during a heat wave and he needs everyone to understand that this was a problem.

Bite the popsicle. This has been a public service announcement.


Assembly Line Revenge

There’s a coworker. This coworker is fast, spazzy, micromanages everyone’s technique, and cannot handle a unit being placed on the wrong side of a hash mark. He also made the catastrophic mistake of laughing at Justin with another employee while Justin was still learning.

Justin clocked it, then he filed it and said nothing.

Then one rotation later this coworker did the full stare down — picked up a unit, held it up, made eye contact, and slowly placed it back down on the correct side of the hash mark like he was Vanna White revealing a letter. Justin, being the completely reasonable adult that he is, spent the next two hours inching every single unit millimeter by millimeter from the correct side of the hash mark to the wrong side of the hash mark.

By the end of the rotation Justin could physically feel the laser stare boring through the back of his skull. Worth it. Completely worth it.

Don’t laugh at people for trying. Especially not Justin.



The Most Interesting Cardiologist Ever

Justin has a heart condition. He goes to Toronto General every two years for a full cardiology workup. This time he had a new doctor.

This new doctor walked into the examination room, got approximately six inches from Justin’s face, looked him dead in the eyes and said — “I just want to meet the Superman.”

Justin was not expecting this.

She proceeded to do what Justin describes as the full Don Juan strut across the room, extended her hand with her fingertips pointed downward like she expected him to kiss the ring, introduced herself, and then told Justin he was the Batman now.

Everything checked out fine by the way. Heart is good. The edibles are approved. Smoking is not approved. Vaping is also not approved but Justin has stopped so that’s fine. And at some point in the future Justin will experience a weird heartbeat from the edibles and when that happens he is to call the doctor directly and say “hello, yes, it happened.”

Justin’s girlfriend is going to find out about all of this by listening to this episode. Justin acknowledges this may cause problems.

Also — Justin wants his defibrillator X-ray framed on his wall. The hospital spent 20 minutes looking for it and couldn’t find it. The search continues.


Listen Now

Popsicles, Assembly Line Revenge and the Most Interesting Cardiologist Ever is available now on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube, and all major platforms.

New episodes of Thoughts Off The Stem drop every Friday at 4:20 PM.


Become a part of the community

join the sesh!


Gear Up For The Sesh.

King Palm is what’s on the table when the mic is on. The same wraps used on the show — now available for your sesh. 🌿


Represent The Sesh.

Five years. Over 200 episodes. Still going. Grab the gear and wear it like you mean it.

Shop The TOTS Official Store → TOTS Official Store

Front view of a black Thoughts Off The Stem (TOTS) premium hoodie featuring bold white font test that reads TOTS EST. 2020 on the centre chest.
Back view of the TOTS Broadcaster hoodie showing a detailed radio tower graphic with 'Thoughts Off The Stem' integrated into the design.

Thoughts Off The Stem A cannabis infused comedy podcast

Join the sesh at tots420.com 🌿 Contact Thoughts Off The Stem

Stop Playing Games: Know Your Value In The Job Market

TOTS420 — Stop Playing Games Know Your Value In The Job Market — Comedy Podcast with Justin Barone

Stop Playing Games: Know Your Value In The Job Market

A lawyer on TikTok said that anyone who answers the salary question in a job interview is an idiot. You should deflect. Check with your family first. Never put a number on yourself.

Justin answered the salary question in a job interview.

Justin has a lot to say about that.

This week on Thoughts Off The Stem it’s a fired up, unfiltered rant about knowing your value, the games employers play, and why the people at the bottom of the org chart — the ones actually keeping everything running — keep getting squeezed while the people at the top drink Scotch and wonder why nobody wants to work anymore.


Become a part of the community

join the sesh!


Gear Up For The Sesh.

King Palm is what’s on the table when the mic is on. The same wraps used on the show — now available for your sesh. 🌿


Thoughts Off The Stem | Cannabis Infused Comedy
Thoughts Off The Stem | Cannabis Infused Comedy
Knowing your value, HR head games and a “Sesh”
Loading
/

The Salary Question Trap

Here’s the scenario. You apply for a job. The posting says the salary range is $30 to $35 an hour. You have ten years of verified experience in exactly the function they’re hiring for. At the end of the interview they ask what you’re looking for in salary.

You say $35 an hour. Because that’s what you’re worth, it’s the industry standard for your level of experience. Because you have the skills, the resume, and the track record to back it up.

And then nothing. You don’t get the job.

According to a lawyer on TikTok you should have deflected. Said you needed to check with your family. Kept the number vague. Justin disagrees. Loudly. If you’ve spent 25 years building skills that an employer is actively looking for — you should be able to say what those skills are worth without being made to feel like a moron for knowing your own value.


Stop Posting Fake Salary Ranges

Here’s the part that actually makes Justin’s blood boil. If you post a job listing with a salary range of $30 to $35 an hour and you have no intention of paying $35 — don’t post $35. Just tell people what you’re paying. Stop wasting the time of people who are already dealing with enough.

The economy is tight. Gas prices are through the roof. A single dad with three kids and one in university does not have time for salary range fuckery. Nobody does. If you want quality you have to pay for quality. If you only want to pay $26 an hour just say $26 an hour and let the person decide if that works for them.

The games aren’t cute. They’re just cruel.


Blue Collar Workers Are Being Criminally Undervalued

This is the part of the episode that lands hardest. The people on the front line — the ones actually doing the physical, exhausting, relentless work that keeps companies functioning — are chronically underpaid while executives sit in boardrooms making decisions about golf holidays and quarterly bonuses.

Cannabis retail is a perfect example. Stores bringing in over $200,000 a month paying their managers $50,000 a year. In Canada. In 2026. You can’t live off that. So they hire younger, less experienced people and pay them less — and then wonder why the service is inconsistent and the turnover is brutal.

Justin’s theory — and it makes sense — is that paying experienced people properly would make you more profitable in the long run. Because experienced people don’t break. They show up, know what they’re doing, and keep your shit functioning without you having to babysit them.


Know Your Value. Say It Out Loud.

Here’s where the episode lands. In every other area of life you’re told to know your value. Know what you bring to the table. Know what you’re worth in relationships, in friendships, in every human interaction.

Then you walk into a job interview and suddenly saying what you’re worth makes you an idiot?

No. You are not an idiot for knowing what 25 years of experience is worth. You are not an idiot for expecting a company to pay the salary range they publicly posted. And you are definitely not an idiot for walking away from employers who play games with people who don’t have time for it.

Know your value. Say it out loud. And stop working for people who don’t.

Those are the thoughts off the stem this week. 🌿


Listen Now

Stop Playing Games: Know Your Value In The Job Market is available now on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube, and all major platforms.

New episodes of Thoughts Off The Stem drop every Friday at 4:20 PM.


Become a part of the community

join the sesh!


Gear Up For The Sesh.

King Palm is what’s on the table when the mic is on. The same wraps used on the show — now available for your sesh. 🌿


Represent The Sesh.

Five years. Over 200 episodes. Still going. Grab the gear and wear it like you mean it.

Shop The TOTS Official Store → TOTS Official Store

Front view of a black Thoughts Off The Stem (TOTS) premium hoodie featuring bold white font test that reads TOTS EST. 2020 on the centre chest.
Back view of the TOTS Broadcaster hoodie showing a detailed radio tower graphic with 'Thoughts Off The Stem' integrated into the design.

Thoughts Off The Stem A cannabis infused comedy podcast

Join the sesh at tots420.com 🌿 Contact Thoughts Off The Stem

Manufacturing is for Robots, THC is for Back Pain and TOTS is for Everyone

TOTS420 — Manufacturing is for Robots THC is for Back Pain and TOTS is for Everyone — A comedy Podcast with Justin Barone

Manufacturing is for Robots, THC is for Back Pain and TOTS is for Everyone

Justin’s back. It’s been a month. And manufacturing almost killed him.

Not literally. But close enough that he earned a nickname — Chafee Chafersen — from walking funny after a week of 10 hour shifts in 45 degree heat. This week on Thoughts Off The Stem it’s a full shoot the shit sesh covering the manufacturing job from hell, a real talk breakdown of THC vs CBD for back pain, and an honest life update from a 45 year old single dad who is very much still figuring it out.

Cheers.


Become a part of the community

join the sesh!


Gear Up For The Sesh.

King Palm is what’s on the table when the mic is on. The same wraps used on the show — now available for your sesh. 🌿


Thoughts Off The Stem | Cannabis Infused Comedy
Thoughts Off The Stem | Cannabis Infused Comedy
Manufacturing is for Robots, THC is for Back Pain and TOTS is for Everyone
Loading
/

Manufacturing is for Robots

Here’s what nobody tells you before you start a manufacturing job. You have 43 seconds per unit on the conveyor belt. You will pick up approximately 67,000 screws per 10 hour shift. Your feet will feel like someone from Misery got to them by the end of day one. Your hands will swell to the point where a size 13 ring no longer fits your middle finger. And the billion dollar company you work for will charge you $18.99 for a replacement work shirt and make you pay for your own lunch.

You’re welcome.

The first week Justin could barely walk from his car to the front door. By week four his hands had built their own muscles. The conveyor doesn’t care about your arthritis, your fat fingers, your leather shoes that need three weeks to break in, or the fact that yesterday you were doing absolutely nothing. It just keeps moving at exactly the speed it was always moving at and you either keep up or you don’t.

It’s grueling, it’s mindless, and it’s temporary. Six month contract. That’s the only thing keeping Chafee Chafersen sane.


THC vs CBD for Back Pain: What the Dispensary Got Wrong

Justin’s dad has been dealing with back pain — specifically degenerative disc disease — and went to the dispensary for help. What he got was a 100mg CBD gummy with barely any THC. What he needed was something completely different.

Here’s the real talk breakdown — and this is not medical advice, talk to your doctor:

CBD is non-psychoactive. It helps with inflammation, joint recovery, muscles and ligaments. It can help you feel calm and relaxed and ride the wave of the day. But CBD alone does not kill pain.

THC is the part of the plant that, because it’s psychoactive, actually helps your body deal with pain directly. If you need real pain relief — especially for something like degenerative disc disease — you need a minimum of 10mg THC alongside your CBD. Not 1mg. Not 0.1mg. Ten milligrams minimum.

The dispensary gave Justin’s dad the wrong thing. A 100mg CBD gummy with trace THC is going to make him feel calm. It is not going to touch the disc pain.

Talk to your doctor. Talk to a physiotherapist. And if you’re using cannabis for pain relief, make sure what you’re getting actually has enough THC in it to do the job.


TOTS is for Everyone

Here’s where the episode lands. Justin is 45. He’s been out of work for a year. He spent that year trying to get TOTS420 off the ground, took a project management certification, watched the listener numbers climb to within 385 of 1000 on Spotify, and then took a manufacturing job because the bills don’t care about your goals.

But the six months isn’t wasted time. It’s a reset. A chance to stop investing emotional energy into jobs that don’t deserve it and redirect that energy into the things that actually matter.

TOTS420 is one of those things. The sesh is one of those things. And if you’ve been listening — share it, follow it, tell someone about it. Because a 45 year old single dad with fat hands and a touch of arthritis is out here putting screws into car parts for 10 hours a day so he can come home and do this for you.

Those are the thoughts off the stem. 🌿


Listen Now

New episodes of Thoughts Off The Stem drop every Friday at 4:20 PM.


Become a part of the community

join the sesh!


Gear Up For The Sesh.

King Palm is what’s on the table when the mic is on. The same wraps used on the show — now available for your sesh. 🌿


Represent The Sesh.

Five years. Over 200 episodes. Still going. Grab the gear and wear it like you mean it.

Shop The TOTS Official Store → TOTS Official Store

Front view of a black Thoughts Off The Stem (TOTS) premium hoodie featuring bold white font test that reads TOTS EST. 2020 on the centre chest.
Back view of the TOTS Broadcaster hoodie showing a detailed radio tower graphic with 'Thoughts Off The Stem' integrated into the design.

Thoughts Off The Stem A cannabis infused comedy podcast

Join the sesh at tots420.com 🌿 Contact Thoughts Off The Stem

When you think thoughts what do you see?

When You Think Thoughts What Do You See

When you think thoughts — what do you actually see? Pictures? Words? A running commentary that won’t shut up? Nothing at all?

It took way too long to figure out that not everyone answers that question the same way. And not just because people have different opinions or different ideas. When people think, they literally experience their thoughts in completely different ways. Some people see vivid pictures and videos, or they see words, and some have an inner monologue that narrates every single thing they do all day long. And some people see absolutely nothing — they just have a thought and react.

This week on Thoughts Off The Stem, Justin Barone goes deep on one of the most fascinating realizations he’s had in a sesh — and it might just change how you see the people around you.


Become a part of the community

join the sesh!


Gear Up For The Sesh.

King Palm is what’s on the table when the mic is on. The same wraps used on the show — now available for your sesh. 🌿


Thoughts Off The Stem | Cannabis Infused Comedy
Thoughts Off The Stem | Cannabis Infused Comedy
When you think thoughts, what do you see?
Loading
/

Not Everyone Sees What You See

As a kid it seems obvious — we’re all learning the same math problem so we must be solving it the same way, right? We agree on something so we must have thought about it the same way. Makes sense until you actually talk to someone about how they think and realize their brain is doing something completely different from yours.

Justin thinks in pictures, words, videos, shapes and sometimes nothing at all — switching between them depending on what the conversation is about or what he’s feeling. Tell him a story and he’s visualizing every detail. Get him deep in thought and the lights go out completely — blank space, just presence and clarity. Get him emotional and suddenly it’s all words, big feelings turning into sentences in his head.

Not everyone works like that. Some people only have the inner monologue. or see shapes, and some people have no visual experience of thought whatsoever — they just feel it and do it.

Isn’t that fascinating?


The Inner Monologue Drill Sergeant

Here’s the one that gets Justin. The inner monologue that just never stops. The voice that narrates everything — I’m getting up, I’m walking, I’m driving, I’m talking to my boss, I’m going to say this.

Justin’s inner monologue isn’t exactly a helpful life coach. It’s more like an angry drill sergeant who shows up the second you sit down with your coffee to remind you that you thought about vacuuming twenty minutes ago and the clock is ticking. Not friendly. Not encouraging. Just pushy, a little bossy, and honestly a touch aggressive.

But could you imagine having that voice running all day? Every single thing narrated in real time? That’s someone else’s entire experience of being alive. And somehow they’re functioning. Respect.


The Hardware Store Kid

Here’s where it gets really interesting. Justin’s uncle tells him about a kid working at a hardware store who literally cannot hammer a nail into a wall. He holds it up, lets go, and tries to hit it before it falls. Every time. The owner is about to fire him.

Then the till system goes down. And this kid — the one who cannot figure out a hammer and a nail — sits down behind the register and gets the entire point of sale system back up and running from scratch.

Everybody’s got their thing. The way you think shapes what you’re good at. And if you can’t visualize a nail going into wood, maybe you’re seeing something else entirely — something that makes you exceptional at a completely different problem.


Give People A Break

Here’s where the episode lands and it’s worth sitting with. If everyone processes their thoughts differently — if some people are running on a non stop inner monologue, some are seeing nothing but shapes, some are being controlled by an angry internal narrator they didn’t ask for — then maybe we need to give each other a little more grace.

You don’t know what’s going on in someone’s head, how they process things, or what their inner voice sounds like or whether they even have one. So maybe — just maybe — be a little nicer to the next guy. Because you genuinely have no idea what’s happening in there.

Those are the thoughts off the stem this week. 🌿


Listen Now

New episodes of Thoughts Off The Stem drop every Friday at 4:20 PM.


Become a part of the community

join the sesh!


Gear Up For The Sesh.

King Palm is what’s on the table when the mic is on. The same wraps used on the show — now available for your sesh. 🌿


Represent The Sesh.

Five years. Over 200 episodes. Still going. Grab the gear and wear it like you mean it.

Shop The TOTS Official Store → TOTS Official Store

Front view of a black Thoughts Off The Stem (TOTS) premium hoodie featuring bold white font test that reads TOTS EST. 2020 on the centre chest.
Back view of the TOTS Broadcaster hoodie showing a detailed radio tower graphic with 'Thoughts Off The Stem' integrated into the design.

Thoughts Off The Stem A cannabis infused comedy podcast

Join the sesh at tots420.com 🌿 Contact Thoughts Off The Stem

Could You Survive Prison: Sesh Hypotheticals, Hear Me Out

could you survive prison, an episode of thoughts off the stem hosted by justin barone

Could you survive prison? Not the Netflix documentary version. Not the podcast where some guy describes it from a studio in Manhattan. The actual yard. Day one. Real prison.

It’s the kind of question that only comes up in a sesh. Someone’s been watching true crime. The conversation goes sideways. And suddenly everyone in the circle is a Navy SEAL with a black belt and an undefeated record.

This week on Thoughts Off The Stem, Justin Barone takes that hypothetical seriously — or as seriously as a cannabis comedy podcast can — and the reality check is both brutal and hilarious.


Become a part of the community

join the sesh!


Gear Up For The Sesh.

King Palm is what’s on the table when the mic is on. The same wraps used on the show — now available for your sesh. 🌿


Thoughts Off The Stem | Cannabis Infused Comedy
Thoughts Off The Stem | Cannabis Infused Comedy
Could You Survive Prison: Sesh Hypotheticals, Hear Me Out
Loading
/


Every Sesh Has A Dwane

You know how it goes. Someone asks if they could take Mike Tyson. Someone else wants to know how many guys they could fight at once. Then that one dude in the circle breaks the silence with full confidence — he’d kick Tyson’s ass, destroy a pack of wolves bare handed, go full special forces on anyone who touched his family, and yeah he could probably take five guys at once.

Every group has a Dwane. Shut up Dwane.

It’s a guy thing. We all want to be the ultimate protector. We all like to think that when the moment comes we’ll somehow channel every action movie we’ve ever watched and just handle it. It’s harmless. It’s funny. And it is absolutely not what would actually happen.


The Prison Yard Reality Check

So let’s say you actually end up in there. Day one on the yard. You’ve heard the advice — assert dominance immediately, take out the biggest guy so everyone knows not to mess with you.

Here’s the problem. Yesterday you were mowing the lawn. You had a tea party with a three year old. gave your wife a foot massage and watched something on Netflix and went to bed at a reasonable hour. You are a blue collar dad with a full dad bod, a touch of arthritis, and absolutely zero hand to hand combat training.

And now you’re supposed to walk across that yard and cold cock a gang member like you’re Jason Statham in a Jason Statham movie.

You are not Jason Statham.

The gap between who we think we are and who we actually are, might be one of the weirdest and most honest things about being a guy. This episode goes there completely unfiltered.


Listen Now

New episodes of Thoughts Off The Stem drop every Friday at 4:20 PM.


Become a part of the community

join the sesh!


Gear Up For The Sesh.

King Palm is what’s on the table when the mic is on. The same wraps used on the show — now available for your sesh. 🌿


Represent The Sesh.

Five years. Over 200 episodes. Still going. Grab the gear and wear it like you mean it.

Shop The TOTS Official Store → TOTS Official Store

Front view of a black Thoughts Off The Stem (TOTS) premium hoodie featuring bold white font test that reads TOTS EST. 2020 on the centre chest.
Back view of the TOTS Broadcaster hoodie showing a detailed radio tower graphic with 'Thoughts Off The Stem' integrated into the design.

Thoughts Off The Stem A cannabis infused comedy podcast

Join the sesh at tots420.com 🌿 Contact Thoughts Off The Stem

Swiss Chalet: They’re Supposed to Be Good at Chicken

Restaurant Horror Stories

TOTS420 — Swiss Chalet: They're Supposed to Be Good at Chicken — Restaurant Horror Stories — Cannabis Comedy Podcast

They Had One Job

This week on Thoughts Off The Stem, Justin Barone breaks down a Swiss Chalet dinner that went completely off the rails — and then takes it further with the most stomach churning restaurant horror stories the internet has ever produced.

There are restaurants that try to do everything and fail at most of it. And then there’s Swiss Chalet — a place that built its entire identity around one thing. Chicken. Just the chicken. Cook it properly and everything else more or less takes care of itself.

So how do you serve it raw?


The Swiss Chalet Experience

It started with a simple plan. Justin and his girlfriend head out for the two can dine deal — nothing fancy, just a reliable chicken dinner at a familiar spot. What they got instead was a masterclass in how not to run a restaurant.

The host was nowhere to be found. One exhausted waitress was running the entire floor. The tables were sticky. And when the food finally arrived the chicken looked wrong before it was even cut into. The kind of wrong you notice immediately but convince yourself to ignore — right up until you cut into the middle and find it completely undercooked.

The bright spot? The waitress. Who was somehow still apologizing professionally while clearly holding the entire establishment together on her own.


The Dude For Real: Restaurant Horror Stories

If the Swiss Chalet story wasn’t enough to put you off eating out, the Dude For Real segment finishes the job. Real stories from real people — coleslaw with shrimp tails scraped from other people’s plates, a restaurant mouse that the server knew by name, a bandaid in the taco lettuce, cockroaches in the coleslaw, and things so bad they don’t need to be described twice.

The restaurant industry has some explaining to do.

More Terrifying Food Fails


This Week’s Weed Facts: How to Make Cannabutter

In the spirit of cooking at home — which after this episode seems like the only reasonable option — this week’s Weed Facts breaks down how to make cannabutter from scratch. Stovetop method, slow cooker method, decarboxylation, straining, and everything you need to turn your flower into an ingredient worth cooking with.

Because at least you know what went into your own food.

Read The Complete Cannabutter Guide


Listen Now

Thoughts Off The Stem | Cannabis Infused Comedy
Thoughts Off The Stem | Cannabis Infused Comedy
Swiss Chalet: They’re Supposed to Be Good at Chicken
Loading
/

Swiss Chalet: They’re Supposed to Be Good at Chicken is available now on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube, and all major platforms.

New episodes of Thoughts Off The Stem drop every Friday at 4:20 PM.

Join The Sesh!
New episodes, behind the scenes, and the kind of content that doesn’t make the main feed. Drop your email and pull up a chair.

Represent The Sesh.

Five years. Over 200 episodes. Still going. Grab the gear and wear it like you mean it.

Shop The TOTS Official Store → TOTS Official Store

Front view of a black Thoughts Off The Stem (TOTS) premium hoodie featuring bold white font test that reads TOTS EST. 2020 on the centre chest.
Back view of the TOTS Broadcaster hoodie showing a detailed radio tower graphic with 'Thoughts Off The Stem' integrated into the design.

Thoughts Off The Stem A cannabis infused comedy podcast

Join the sesh at tots420.com 🌿

Contact Thoughts Off The Stem

Everything Is Fake: Your Reality Is For Sale

Justin Barone host of Thoughts Off The Stem investigates paid protests astroturfing the Manhattan Madam and Crowds on Demand with money flying in the background

Someone slid into my DMs last week and asked me to have a guest on the podcast.

Now I get approached from time to time and most of the time it’s pretty straightforward. But this one stopped me cold. Because the person reaching out was Kristin M. Davis — better known as the Manhattan Madam — and she wanted me to interview the CEO of a company called Crowds on Demand.

So I did what any self respecting pothead would do. I went down the rabbit hole.

What I found was way more interesting than any interview would have been. And honestly? Way more disturbing.


What Is Astroturfing and Why Should You Care?

Before we get into the Manhattan Madam and the fake protest guy, let’s talk about astroturfing — because if you don’t know what it is, you need to.

Astroturfing is the practice of manufacturing the appearance of grassroots public support where none actually exists. The name comes from AstroTurf — the fake grass — because that’s exactly what it is. Fake grass roots.

Paid protests and astroturfing go hand in hand and in 2026 the industry is booming. According to public reporting, Crowds on Demand saw a 400% surge in paid protest requests in 2025 alone. That’s not a niche service anymore. That’s an industry.

And somebody is buying it.

Listen to the sesh:

Thoughts Off The Stem | Cannabis Infused Comedy
Thoughts Off The Stem | Cannabis Infused Comedy
Manifesting, Is It Being Delusional With Extra Steps
Loading
/

Meet the Manhattan Madam: Kristin M. Davis

Let’s start with who reached out to me because this is where it gets immediately weird.

Kristin M. Davis — the Manhattan Madam — ran a high end prostitution ring in New York City that allegedly serviced some very prominent clients including Eliot Spitzer, Alex Rodriguez and David Beckham. She served time at Rikers Island, ran for Governor of New York in 2010, was contacted by Robert Mueller’s office in 2018 in connection with Russian election interference, and was later convicted for distributing drugs.

She has since founded Hope House to help women in need — and I’ll give her credit for that because second chances are real and people do change.

But now she runs a PR firm called Think Right PR that specializes in rebranding people and companies with — let’s call it complicated public histories. And she reached out to me to have Adam Swart, the CEO of Crowds on Demand, on my show to talk about the mechanics of fake protests and manufactured reality.

I’ll be honest. My first thought was — why would the Manhattan Madam be repping the fake protest guy?

My second thought was — actually that makes perfect sense.

Crowds on Demand: Your Reality Has a Price Tag

Here’s what Crowds on Demand actually is.

Adam Swart founded the company in 2012. It started with “celebrity experience” services — fake paparazzi, hired fans, that kind of thing. Over time it expanded into organized protests, political demonstrations, and publicity stunts using paid actors posing as members of the public.

In plain English — you can buy a crowd. Right now. Today.

ServiceWhat They SayWhat It Actually Is
Celebrity Arrival ServiceProfessional crowd for your eventHired fans to make you look important
Advocacy Group CreationWe create and staff advocacy groups with suitable leadershipInventing fake grassroots organizations from scratch with hired actors as “leaders”
Protest OrganizationAmplifying your message through demonstrationsPaid protesters starting at $39.99 per activist
Mergers & Acquisitions SupportShaping public company dealsManufacturing protests to tank a competitor’s stock price
Message AmplificationWhen other strategies have failedWhen the truth isn’t working — buy a fake consensus instead

A Washington Post columnist described receiving a marketing email from the company offering their “Celebrity Arrival Service” to politicians — promising to stuff events with paid actors to make candidates look popular.

John Oliver dedicated a segment on Last Week Tonight to them. They’ve been sued for alleged extortion. They’ve been accused of creating a fake Black Lives Matter organization in Dallas called Dallas Justice Now that sent letters urging wealthy white families not to send their kids to Ivy League universities. The same Republican marketing firm was also behind a pro-police group called Keep Dallas Safe.

Both sides. Same company. Same fake grass.

And demand is up 400%.

The Whistleblower Who Won’t Blow the Whistle

Here’s where it gets really rich.

Swart is now positioning himself as a whistleblower. He wants to come clean about the fake protest industry. Says he wants transparency. And to expose the manufactured outrage machine.

Except — he won’t name his clients. He won’t name his sources. And his company bio still openly boasts about creating fake advocacy groups from scratch.

Let me say that again. The guy who wants to blow the whistle on astroturfing still sells astroturfing.

Here’s a breakdown of what his own bio says versus what it actually means:

What His Bio SaysWhat It Actually Means
“We create advocacy groups and staff them with suitable leadership”We invent fake organizations and hire actors to pretend to be their leaders
“We shaped large public company mergers and acquisitions”We manufactured protests to pressure companies into deals
“We amplify messages when other strategies have failed”When the truth isn’t working we manufacture a fake consensus
“I want transparency in the protest industry”I want to be the regulated gatekeeper of the very deception I pioneered

When you’re whistleblowing you’re supposed to do it for the better of society — not for the better of your bank account.

He isn’t blowing the whistle because he grew a conscience. He’s blowing the whistle to become the “legitimate” face of an industry he built. It’s the same hustle with a press release attached.

The Inversion of Truth: Two Peas in a Very Shady Pod

Here’s what struck me most when I put these two together.

Davis uses her criminal past to create trust as an expert on corruption. Swart uses fake crowds to create the appearance of truth through manufactured consensus.

They are both selling the same thing — the idea that nothing is real, so you might as well buy their version of reality.

The PeopleKristin M. DavisAdam Swart
BackgroundManhattan Madam, convicted felon, Mueller witnessFormer journalist turned fake protest entrepreneur
Current pitchReformed criminal turned PR expert on scandalFake protest pioneer turned whistleblower
What they’re sellingTrust through criminal credibilityTruth through manufactured consensus
The hustleMy past makes me an expert on deceptionMy deception makes me qualified to expose deception
What they won’t revealThe full client list from her pastCurrent client list and protest contracts

It’s not a reformation. It’s an expansion of the same hustle with better branding.


So Should I Have Him On The Show?

I asked my audience this at the end of the episode and I’m asking you here too — because I genuinely don’t know.

On one hand I don’t think I’ll get an honest conversation. He won’t name clients. He won’t name sources. And everything about the way this pitch landed in my DMs feels like exactly the kind of manufactured narrative his company specializes in.

On the other hand — sometimes the most interesting interviews are the ones where you already know the guy is full of it.

What do you think? Drop it in the comments. Should I have Adam Swart on Thoughts Off The Stem?


The Real Issue Nobody Wants to Talk About

Here’s the thing that actually bothers me most about all of this.

Most people can’t be bothered to protest. Real grassroots movements are hard. They require time, energy, belief and sacrifice. The fact that there’s a booming market for fake protests tells you something really important — the people with money have figured out that they can skip all of that and just buy the appearance of public support instead.

Your outrage is for sale. Your reality is manufactured. And most people scrolling their feed have no idea whether the protest they just watched was organic or ordered off a menu at $39.99 per head.

I basically assume at this point that anything I watch or read is at least partially bullshit. And honestly? That’s a really exhausting way to live.

So smoke one, think critically, and maybe — just maybe — question the next “spontaneous” protest you see trending on your feed.

Those are my thoughts off the stem. 🍃


🎙 Listen to the Full Episode

Everything Is Fake: Your Reality Is for Sale is out now on Spotify and YouTube.

I go deeper on both Davis and Swart, break down exactly how the fake protest machine works, and ask you directly — should I have him on the show?

👇 Listen or watch right now:

🎧 SPOTIFY LINK ▶️ YOUTUBE LINK

New episodes drop every Friday at 4:20PM. Subscribe so the sesh comes straight to you — we’re pushing to 1,000 followers on Spotify and every follow counts.

The world is full of BS, King Palm isn’t – just like Thoughts Off The Stem. Relax and enjoy a longer smoother, full flavored sesh.

Join the sesh at tots420.com 🌿

Contact Thoiughts Off The Stem

Research links for the Sesh:

https://crowdsondemand.com/

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kristin_M._Davis

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crowds_on_Demand

https://www.nbclosangeles.com/news/local/concerned-citizens-turn-out-to-be-political-theater/2021439/

https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2024-03-14/paid-protester-company-looking-to-hire-7-foot-300-pound-giants-for-intimidation-factor

When Your Girlfriend Starts Throwing Out Your Crap

Man attacked by hair and lotions for Thoughts Off The Stem podcast about relationship personal space when your girlfriend throws out your favourite crap.

You need terpenes that help anxiety, now that your girl has turned your space in to a “Penthouse” full of scented candles.

One day you’re a king. You have a queen-sized bed, a single kettlebell in the corner for your morning sets, and enough floor space to do some body weight squats and lunges to kick start leg day. It’s a temple of minimalist efficiency. You even have your original razor boxes neatly stacked under the sink because—let’s be honest—original packaging makes moving easier.

Then, she moves in.

Suddenly, your kettlebell is a doorstop. Your room has been annexed by blackout curtains and a king-sized bed that took up the last of your “activity” space. Your bathroom vanity storage space? Gone. It’s now a graveyard for 14 different lotions that all smell like “Spiced Rain” but serve no discernible purpose.

But that’s not even the scary part.

1. The Shower Wall Resident

You’re mid-shower, washing your business, and you look up. There, at eye level, is a matted mask of hair, clumped up, just… hanging out. You know it’s not yours. But it is a permanent resident of your new life.

2. The Nether-Region Garrote

You ever get halfway through your workday—maybe you’re in a meeting, maybe you’re at the gym—and you feel an aggressive, high-tensile tug? It feels like an invisible Bond villain is trying to reduce the flow of anything to the brains of your operation. Yeah there’s a hair wrapped around your balls bro.

Yeah, there’s a hair wrapped around your balls, bro. It’s the Invisible Assassin. Along with his buddy—the stray strand of your girlfriend’s hair hitching a ride on your caboose like a train-hopping hobo—it’s now flossing your “brown eye” like a piece of high-test dental tape.

Listen: If you’ve survived the Hair Assassin, you need to hear the full support group session on the latest episode of [Thoughts Off The Stem]—Click Here to Listen!


How to Survive “Girlfriend HQ” (Without Losing Your Mind)

If the sudden appearance of a vanity full of hairbrushes and girly stuff elevates your heart rate to 120 BPM, nature has a “mute” button. We call them Terpenes.

When your bachelor pad dies and your girlfriend starts tossing all your favourite crap, these terpenes help anxiety and you should look for them when choosing a strain to curb your anxiety:

Terpenes that help anxiety the invisible assassin

TerpenesThe Science
Limonene (The Paranoia Killer):A 2024 Johns Hopkins study proved that inhaling Limonene with your THC stops that “someone’s trying to suffocate me” anxiety.
Linalool (The Serotonin Shield):Found in floral strains, this terpene blocks serotonin transporters to keep your “rest and digest” mode active. It turns “Why is there a bar fridge here?” into “Hey, a bar fridge for my whiskey!”
Beta-Caryophyllene (The CB2 Specialist):It’s spicy, peppery, and hits your body’s calming receptors without making you too stoned to find the drawing of a wang she hid in your suitcase five years ago.

Myrcene (The Relaxation Foundation)
Increases sedation and muscle relaxation; helps cannabinoids hit faster. Earthy, musky, or “skunky” strains—mostly Indicas—are your best bet for a Myrcene fix.

How to Get Your Terps: Product Type Matters

Not all consumption methods are created equal. If you’re trying to outmaneuver the Invisible Assassin, you need to make sure you aren’t literally burning off your relief. Here’s the breakdown of how to get the most out of your terpene profile:

Product TypeThe Terpene DeliveryPro-Tip
FlowerHighest PotentialVaporize at low temperatures. High heat (combustion) destroys delicate terpenes.
VapesVariableAvoid distillates with “botanical” terps. Look for Live Resin or Full-Spectrum to keep the plant’s soul intact.
EdiblesLow (Usually)Most terpenes are lost during the infusion process, unless the brand specifically adds them back in.
TincturesConsistentStick to Full-Spectrum tinctures. Isolates are just the cannabinoids and usually have zero terpene benefit.

The Weird Truth

Relationships are weird. If you aren’t shouting “SHUT UP” at each other when someone sneezes or doing an elaborate mating dance involving one-handed clapping or dong slapping are you even in love?

You might have lost your floor space, but you gained a partner in crime who knows that if you’re happy, she’s happy. She’s just trying to make your space a sanctuary. Think of it like the Batcave—just pour some whiskey from that decanter on top of her fridge and ignore the floral aromas of your new blissful paradise.

Transitioning from a bachelor pad to a shared home is a wild ride, but as long as you’ve got the right Terps and a sense of humor, you’ll survive the “Invisible Assassin.”


Join the Conversation!

What’s the weirdest thing your partner did to your “man cave” after moving in? Have you ever been a victim of the Nether-Region Garrote? Drop a comment below and TAG a homie who’s currently losing the war for his under-sink storage! Don’t forget to share this post to help other brothers in arms survive the “Spiced Rain” invasion.

Leave a Reply

Subscribe to our newsletter!

Contact Thoughts Off The Stem

Absurd Humor aphantasia Cannabis Comedy cannabis comedy podcast cannabis cooking cannabis culture Cannabis Education Cannabis Podcast Comedy Podcast Digital Age funny food stories High Thoughts how to make cannabutter Justin Barone meta glasses mind blowing facts Observational Humor parenting comedy parenting humor parenting rant parenting teenagers raising teens raw chicken ray ban meta Relatable Comedy relationship comedy restaurant horror stories sarcastic comedy single dad single parent smoke and talk podcast social commentary Society and Culture stoner comedy Stoner Philosophy Swiss Chalet tech review teenagers Thoughts Off The Stem TOTS420 unfiltered comedy wearable tech Weed Facts Weed History weed was better when it was illegal

My First Time Using A Gravity Bong: High Lessons

Justin Barone of TOTS podcast sharing High Lessons and gravity bong stoner stories.

The Gravity Bong: A DIY Masterpiece (and My Biggest Fail)

Whether you call it a Gravity Bong, a Bucket, or a ‘Geeb,’ this DIY stoner invention is a rite of passage. But as I learned the hard way, water pressure doesn’t care about your plans. Before we dive into the 2,700-year history of weed, let’s talk about the ‘High Lesson’ that left me waking up on a stranger’s couch.

Welcome to Thoughts Off The Stem! Today, we taking a trip down memory lane and sharing my first experience with “Buckets”. That’s right we’re talking about the time I hit that DIY atom bomb of a bong. Where the amount of clouds you have to inhale force their way out your ears like a cartoon and the unexpected Life Lessons that revealed themselves in that moment. Then we’re laughing at some of the more absurd but hilarious Stoner Moments from people online. We’re not just talking about getting high; we’re talking about the lessons that only come from those truly elevated perspectives.

The Bucket that started it all…

My very first experience with a gravity bucket wasn’t just a stoner moment—it was a full-blown initiation into another dimension. It was college, a time for exploration and, in my case, a distinct lack of proper planning.

  • The Scenario: A makeshift bucket in a cramped dorm room.
  • The Moment: Taking the rip, and immediately realizing I’d bit off way more than I could chew.
  • The Fail: Waking up hours later, not in my bed, not in a friend’s bed, but passed out on a total stranger’s couch in a completely different building. The lesson here? Know your limits, and maybe always have a wingman when trying something new.

What is a “Bucket”?

For those new to the game, a “Bucket” (also known as a Gravity Bong) is the ultimate Stoner MacGyver creation. It uses water pressure and gravity to create a vacuum that pulls a massive, concentrated cloud of smoke into a chamber (usually a 2-liter bottle). You then push the chamber down, using water pressure to force that smoke directly into your lungs. It’s effective, it’s intense, and as I learned, it requires a certain level of respect.

Weed Facts: A History of MacGyvering (2,700 Years & Counting)

You think building a bucket from a soda bottle is impressive? As I discuss in this episode, humans have been MacGyvering weed accessories for centuries. The fascinating History of Weed is filled with innovative ways people have utilized this plant for medicine, spiritual practices, and, yes, getting incredibly high.

the Historythe findings
The Shaman’s Secret (2,700 Years Ago)Paleoethnobotanists discovered nearly two pounds of 2,700-year-old cannabis in the burial pit of an ancient Gūshī shaman in China. This wasn’t for rope—analyses concluded this ancient society was already cultivating cannabis for psychoactive and divinatory purposes.
The Oldest Bong? (2,500 Years Ago)In 2019, archaeologists uncovered 2,500-year-old braziers—vessels designed to burn large quantities of cannabis—which contained potent residues. This proves people were actively burning and inhaling the plant for its effects centuries before the first gravity bucket was made.
The Global History:Humans were using cannabis 10,000 years ago, and trade routes linking Europe and East Asia likely increased its usage 5,000 years ago. From being an approved medicine in the U.S. Pharmacopeia in 1850 to the futile start of the “War on Drugs” in 1972, the story of this plant is one of invention and innovation.
January 2026 Resurrected EnzymesScientists “revived” ancient THC enzymes in a lab.

Dude, for Real: The Funniest Things People Do High

To wrap up this signature “High Lessons” launch, we’re looking at the hilarious side of those Stoner Moments. Waking up on a stranger’s couch is just the tip of the iceberg!

Check out this amazing list of 32 of the Funniest Things People Did While They Were High, which highlights the kind of creative-but-clumsy genius that only comes from a truly elevated state. From trying to “un-bake” a cake to getting caught in a complex conversation with a houseplants, these stories are the definition of a “High Lesson”.

What’s Your Biggest Stoner Moment?

The history of cannabis shows that we’ve been finding “High Lessons” in this plant for thousands of years. Whether it’s an ancient shaman in China or a college student on a stranger’s couch, the journey of discovery never really ends. These Stoner Moments are more than just funny stories—they are the building blocks of the Life Lessons we share here on Buckets.

Now, I want to hear from you. We’ve all had those moments where things didn’t go quite as planned, but we came out the other side with a great story (and maybe a little more wisdom).

What was your very first “MacGyver” moment—did you build a classic bucket, or were you more of an apple-pipe architect? Let’s hear your most creative (or disastrous) inventions in the comments below! If this story reminded you of a certain someone, share it with your favorite ‘engineering’ buddy!

Leave a Reply

Subscribe to our newsletter!

Absurd Humor aphantasia Cannabis Comedy cannabis comedy podcast cannabis cooking cannabis culture Cannabis Education Cannabis Podcast Comedy Podcast Digital Age funny food stories High Thoughts how to make cannabutter Justin Barone meta glasses mind blowing facts Observational Humor parenting comedy parenting humor parenting rant parenting teenagers raising teens raw chicken ray ban meta Relatable Comedy relationship comedy restaurant horror stories sarcastic comedy single dad single parent smoke and talk podcast social commentary Society and Culture stoner comedy Stoner Philosophy Swiss Chalet tech review teenagers Thoughts Off The Stem TOTS420 unfiltered comedy wearable tech Weed Facts Weed History weed was better when it was illegal